You're beautiful

Hello my friends-

After getting over the jetlag, missing vacation, hating being back at work, and the flu, I am done with excuses. I am ready to get back on track. Today has been great so far and I am excited to pick up where I left off. I cannot wait to move down a pants size. I was at a point where I didn't mind looking in the mirror and now I'm kind of like "meh".

So to go over the basics; I will eat healthy as often as possible. I will find ways to fit exercise into my daily life. I will only give in to unhealthy foods if they are a 10 out of 10 on my yummy scale and I feel like I deserve a treat. I will reward myself with something that is not food every 5 pounds. I will cut back on my drinking.

I'm ready.

I can't wait to get back on the Wii fit when I get home even though I'm sure it's going to yell at me. The Jerk.

The new site is up but not quite running yet. I don't want to make it the main site until it's functional at more than a blog level. To help start off my sections I was wondering if the people who are my readers now would like to contribute stories that will be on the website when it launches. You don't have to do this but if you decide to I would very much appreciate it and I think we could inspire a lot of people.

Today's topic: Self Image (I know it's broad, it's so you can take it where you want to. If you're not heavy you can still write about issues you've had with yourself or if you are any weight and have had no issues tell us how and why)

I'll start.

As I've said before my weight has ranged from 159 - 200 over the years after high school. There was a point right after college when I started a medication that had the happy side effect of making me lose weight (for a little while) it just reduced my appetite. I remember feeling full for the first time. This was the first time I went down to 159. I looked pretty good, as a girl of 5'7" who had been considerably heavier before. Unfortunately I didn't notice. My confidence was at such a low level that every time I looked in the mirror I saw the same pudgy girl I had seen all my life and I was disgusted. I had issues letting anyone see me naked, I thought I was ugly and incredibly fat. It was at that time that I gained my first bit of confidence. A person that I was... we'll say dating, could not understand why I hid under the covers all the time. Finally it got to a point where he ripped them off me and left me on the bed in my birthday suit. I curled up in a ball and tried to cover myself. He gave me back the sheet but repeated "You're beautiful" to me about 300 times while I sobbed and finally relinquished the sheet. After that I knew that if a man wanted to be with me he liked seeing me naked and that there were very few people that were completely perfect, and that most people knew that. That's how I became comfortable with my body. (I still don't always love it) but I'm comfortable.

Love you,

Lula Mae